Some humor about old age has accumulated in my file, so here goes.

The thing about old age is that one does not get a chance to practice before it arrives. Yes, there are signs, but it basically slips up on a person.

In older years, skin abnormalities appear. Dark spots.  Some large enough to be named after family pets. 

A 104-year old woman was asked, “What is the best thing about being 104?”  She is reported to have said, “No peer pressure.”

One geezer said, “I felt like my body was out of shape, so I got my doctor’s permission to join a fitness club. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.

An elderly woman decided to prepare her will and told her pastor she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Walmart.

“Walmart?” The pastor exclaimed. “Why Walmart?”  “So my daughters will visit me twice a week.” 

Memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory’s not as sharp as it used to be.

The Senility Prayer:  “Lord, Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do like, and the eyesight to tell the difference.”