“Hey, look, the line to Star Tours (Los Angeles’ Disneyland) is down!”

When this article was written (about 1985) Star Tours at Disneyland was the most popular ride.  But it can require a hefty time commitment—an hour.  To pacify people as they wait, there was an “illusion of progress.”  Imagine that you are there. Here’s what happens. 

Visualize how a three hundred foot long bow tie would look from the air.  The entrance to the line is in the middle, on the bottom of the knot and the Star Tours building is on the top side of the knot—right in the middle of the knot.  So one enters the line only 25 feet from the destination—all part of the psychology of keeping people patient.

If the rope-canyons are full, employees may run out and string up another 100 feet of line dividers, so people passing by will think the line has shortened.

Once a person enters the maze of rope-formed canyons, he is encouraged by steady movement.  He thinks, “The big bucks I paid to get into this place is worth it cause I’ll be on this ride in just a few minutes” [40 minutes. Are we having fun yet?]

Mid-way through the line, another “illusion of progress” is revealed.   You get close to the building entrance. The attendee thinks, “I’m getting close,” only to be directed 100 feet beyond it to the end of the bow tie, so you continue slowly through switch-backs at each end of the bow tie.  This is a Disney science.  They know exactly what the traffic will bear before people will blow their top. 

You are at the building entrance and you assume the actual ride is only seconds away inside the darkness of that magic entrance.  Wrong again.  More filler awaits you.  Inside, the P.A. announces departure to one of the exotic moons of Jupiter, as though it were a hop up to San Francisco.  A video ad shows a space ship blasting off to a distant point in the galaxy.

More hype and filler numbs you to the fact you’ve waited nearly 50 minutes.  A simulated space ship disaster, complete with humorous robots, occurs just over the metal railing.  It is good for two minutes of forgetting your tired feet.

Mr. Al Shacklett, operations researcher for Disneyworld, says people will wait more patiently if, at given points in the line, a sign informs them how much longer the wait will be.

The January 6, 1989 edition of ABC’s 20/20 pointed out some things about waiting in line.  “People who keep track Liar or face? of such things, say that Americans spend 37 billion hours a year waiting in lines.”  John Stossel’s article, Hurry Up and Wait, said it is not the wait that most angers people, but line jumping that brings a maddening sense of injustice.

People will also wait more cheerfully if there are mirrors along the line.  Why?  Because people become distracted by looking at themselves.

Does God give us “illusions of progress?”  Does He buy us off with mirrors, music, or distractions?  No.  God is not into fantasy, deception, or behavioral psychology.  He spreads the results of our actions in front of us.  No surprises.

God tells us what will happen if we obey Him and if we don’t.  Deuteronomy 28-30 is repetitive (Sin has made us dumb, so God has to make it simple.)  “And if you obey Me,” says God, “you will be above other nations; blessed in the city and in the country; your crops will thrive; you will have many children; you will be blessed when you come in and when you go out; you will lend to nations and borrow from none, and you will be the head and not the tail.”  Second graders can get it—why can’t we adults?

With equal clarity, God tells us disobedience brings hardship and problems:  “If you do not obey the Lord your God, He will send confusion and rebuke in everything you put your hand to; you will be plagued with diseases; you will come before your enemies from one direction and flee from them in seven directions, you will build a house and not live in it; the alien who lives among you will rise above you; and you will become the tail and not the head.”

God does not operate His world by giving people illusions of progress.  No games.  No filler.

Star Tours’ final stroke of deception came when I actually got to the ride.  Two other ride units were not being operated.  The wait could have been 20 minutes instead of an hour.  But that fits the pattern.  Since the actual time on the ride is about 2 minutes, 95% of the entertaining has to be done before the ride begins.

The ride exits out through a company clothing boutique.  Departing the store, I heard some teens gleefully yelling to their friends, “Hey, look, the Star Tours line is down!”